What’s in a Name? More Than Just Letters
A name is often the first thing we share with the world. It holds our history, our lineage, and sometimes, the biases of those around us. For many navigating cross-cultural identities, a name can be both a source of connection and a challenge.
Through my work at Road to Recovery, I’ve supported clients and supervisees grappling with the complexities of identity—how they shape identity, how systems interact with them, and how they influence personal and professional lives. Whether someone feels empowered by their name or burdened by it, one thing is clear: names carry weight.
Academic research supports this complexity.
Studies have shown that names influence first impressions (Cotton et al., 2021) and even hiring decisions (Bertrand & Mullainathan, 2004). This demonstrates how names are not just personal but are also shaped by broader societal structures.
From a psychological perspective, names act as a form of symbolic identity, shaping self-concept and the way others perceive us (Erikson, 1968). Philosophically, existentialists argue that names, like identity, are fluid and constructed through lived experiences (Sartre, 1943 *Full Text Version available below for anyone who is philosophically inclined).
1. Names as Cultural Anchors: Balancing Tradition and Personal Identity
In many collectivist cultures, names signify lineage and heritage. They connect individuals to their families and communities, whereas individualist cultures may prioritize personal preference. I often hear from supervisees who work with clients navigating this tension, especially around name changes after marriage. In fact, there's a recent article explicating the complexity of this matter for Asian women.
A personal example comes to mind: a supervisee once shared how their client, a woman from a South Asian background, struggled with the expectation to keep her maiden name while living in a Western country where taking a spouse’s name was the norm. Her name carried her family’s legacy, yet she felt pressured to conform. This internal conflict is one I’ve witnessed several times in personal and therapy spaces.
Therapeutic Insight: Ask yourself—does my name reflect my sense of self, or am I holding onto it for others? Journaling about this can help clarify feelings around cultural and personal identity.
2. The Psychological Impact of Name-Based Bias
Names are often the first impression we make, and unfortunately, research shows that non-Western names can lead to systemic challenges in employment, banking, and legal settings (Kang et al., 2016).
The frustration of constantly correcting pronunciation or proving legitimacy can be exhausting. The latter has been a personal problem of mine, for the last 20 years.
At Road to Recovery, name-based bias is definitely a topic that gets discussed in supervision and client work. A supervisee once shared how their client, an immigrant therapist, had repeatedly been questioned about their credentials simply because their name was unfamiliar. Despite their qualifications, they felt the need to work twice as hard to prove themselves. Another practitioner shared her shock when she witnessed recruitment bias in her company.
Therapeutic Insight: If you’ve faced discrimination due to your name, acknowledging the emotional impact is important. Finding safe spaces to talk about these experiences—whether in therapy or support groups—can provide relief and validation. Find someone with lived experience that you think can provide you with the emotional and practical support you need.
3. Identity is Fluid: Why You’re More Than Just a Name
Identity isn’t static—it shifts with our experiences. Many individuals use different names in different spaces, and that’s okay. I’ve seen clients, family and friends alike navigate this with both frustration and acceptance.
My own experience as a minority and supervising therapist echoes this. One personal example was my mother. She was happy to be known by different names in different social circles. However, she did not have to navigate the employment world as much as she was an expatriate wife. Her name did, however, affect the quality and responsiveness of her healthcare towards the end of life.
A professional example: One supervisee, working with a bilingual client, shared how the client used their birth name at home but an anglicized name at work. They worried this meant they were losing part of themselves. But through therapy, they realized they weren’t betraying their roots—they were simply navigating multiple worlds.
This aligns with research on cultural identity fluidity (Chirkov, 2009), which highlights how individuals adapt their identities across different cultural settings as a means of self-preservation and integration.
Therapeutic Insight: If you use different names in different settings, ask yourself: Does this feel like a burden, or does it help me move fluidly between spaces? There is no right or wrong way—only what works for you.
4. The Personal is Political: Names as Resistance and Empowerment
For some, keeping a name is an act of defiance against colonial histories, patriarchal traditions, or systemic pressures. Others change their names to reclaim their own narratives.
A core value at Road to Recovery is helping individuals embrace their autonomy. In my book, The Culturally Informed Trauma Workbook, I guide the exploration of how systemic forces shape the identity we carry. Understanding this can empower individuals to make choices that feel right for them—whether that means keeping, changing, or modifying their name.
Therapeutic Insight: If you’re facing external pressure to change your name, take a step back and ask: Who benefits from this decision? If the answer isn’t you, it may be time to reconsider.
5. Navigating Name Choices: Emotional and Practical Considerations
Beyond cultural and emotional weight, name choices often come down to practicality. The paperwork, legalities, and professional identity shifts can be overwhelming.
Some, (like myself), hesitate due to the administrative burden, while others find that aligning their name with their evolving identity brings peace.
Therapeutic Insight: If the decision feels overwhelming, break it into steps. Consider what matters most: emotional connection, ease of use, or cultural significance. There is no wrong choice—only what aligns with your journey.
Final Thoughts: Owning Your Name, Owning Your Story
Your name is an important part of your story, but it does not define your worth. At Road to Recovery, empowering individuals to explore their identities in ways that honor their values, history, and personal growth is core to the work.
If you’ve ever questioned the role of your name in your life, you’re not alone. It’s a deeply personal, evolving relationship. Whether you choose to keep, change, or modify your name, the choice is yours - albeit to the extent of the barriers your circumstances impose.
If this resonates with you, consider exploring these themes further in therapy or through reflective exercises.
Your story—and your name—deserve to be honored.
Whether you're personally reflecting on identity or working as a therapist supporting others in this space, thoughtful conversations can be transformative. If you’d like to explore these themes in therapy or supervision, I welcome you to reach out.
Sources:
Bertrand, M., & Mullainathan, S. (2004). Are Emily and Greg More Employable than Lakisha and Jamal? A Field Experiment on Labor Market Discrimination. American Economic Review, 94(4), 991-1013.
Chirkov, V. (2009). Summary of the criticism and of the potential ways to improve acculturation psychology. International Journal of Intercultural Relations, 33(2), 177-180.
Cotton, J., O’Neill, S., & Griffin, B. (2021). The name game: The influence of names on first impressions and decision-making. Journal of Applied Psychology, 106(3), 456-470.
Kang, S. K., DeCelles, K. A., Tilcsik, A., & Jun, S. (2016). Whitened Résumés: Race and Self-Presentation in the Labor Market. Administrative Science Quarterly, 61(3), 469-502.
Sartre, J.-P. (1943). Being and Nothingness. Gallimard. *Full Text Version for anyone who is philosophically inclined.
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